Gaylord Focker

Yes, that's right, I went out with a male nurse. A murse as I like to call them. Everything about this date probably should have made me sick enough to go to the MD afterward, but that is besides the point. Here are the highlights.
1. Met Murse and his friends, murse informs friends we met at the gym. This is indeed false.
2. Murse takes me to dinner. To a $5.99 Buffett (it was actually good, but come on, please let me know you think I'm worth more than that. And if not, take me to McDonalds instead)
3. The entire evening I think murse is trying to take my stats sans stethoscope, as he is very very handsy!
4. Murse doesn't leave a tip on the table for the cleanup crew, classy. Sometimes this is acceptable, however when he paid at the front counter they specifically asked "would you like to leave a tip on your card for the wait staff". Murse said no and acted like he checked his wallet to confirm he had cash.
5. At the end of the evening, murse attempted to "take my temperature" by slipping something under my tongue! Yeah right!

Turns out, murse was onto something as after the date, I felt the need for some medical attention; perhaps some prescriptions for some hard core drugs to pretend that this date never actually took place. No wonder Doogie Howser went gay.